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May Jamie Dimon Get His Wish

 April 19, 2010 12:26 PM

Jamie Dimon, head of JP Morgan/Chase, was quoted as saying:

"When profits fall too sharply then capital will move somewhere else, where there is more money to be earned, for example non-regulated markets," Chief Executive Jamie Dimon said in the German mass circulation Sunday paper Welt am Sonntag.

"The question is, is that what regulators want?," said Dimon who heads the second-largest U.S. bank.

In the German interview, he also said the banking industry could do with more influence on politicians.

I have an excellent solution to Mr. Dimon's request.

See, JP Morgan apparently was involved in a sordid little scheme in Jefferson County, Alabama, in which a number of politicians (and their friends) decided to hand some bribes around.

The outcome of that little scheme was that a sewer system replacement wound up costing the citizens of the county twenty five times what it should have, and much of that (improper at best and illicit in all probability) extra cost went to JP Morgan.

Oh, and in addition to the outcome of this job costing the fine citizens of Jefferson County far more than it should have (that county, by the way, includes the city of Birmingham) a number of politicians and others went to prison - either as a result of a plea of "guilty" or after a trial by a "jury of one's peers".

It is thus entirely fair (and not libelous) to say not that there was "alleged" bribery involved but that actual bribery took place.  That is, this has now been proved in a court of law, at least with regards to those who have been convicted.

To date, however, nobody from JP Morgan (JPM) has been indicted or charged in connection with this sordid little mess.

It therefore seems appropriate that the best resolution to Mr. Dimon's request would be for him to be criminally charged as the head of JP Morgan/Chase in connection with the Jefferson County case and, upon conviction, he can be placed as a cellmate with the fine politicians from Jefferson County who are already serving a sentence, thereby gaining as much "influence" on those politicians as he is willing and able to absorb!

Of course Mr. Dimon, like all Americans, is entitled to the presumption of innocence, a jury of one's peers, and a speedy public trial.  I suggest that the jury should be comprised of citizens of Jefferson County, since they were inherently part of this sordid mess of a transaction and thus are most-certain Mr. Dimon's "peers" for the purposes of any alleged offense.

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