Mar. 29--BIGGEST ARTISTIC CHALLENGE: Turning "Das Kapital," Karl Marx's seminal 1867 treatise on political economics, into a musical. A Chinese theater company in Shanghai seeks to prove that you really can dance to Marxist theory -- sing, too, if that big, tangled beard doesn't prove too daunting. "They are still working on the script," said Zhang Jun, an advisor on the production. The bet here is they're still trying to come up with a rhyme for "bourgeoisie."

BIGGEST UNDERSTATEMENT: "What a nuisance." --Utsav Chibbad, shopping at a New Delhi car dealership, considering the prospect of thousands of new Nanos (base price: $2,200) clogging India's already jammed roads. Advance orders for the tiny, new Nano, billed as the world's least expensive car, have already hit 1 million. If the Nano hits the U.S. market, American dealerships might find the invasion more than a "nuisance."

WORST NEWS FOR MOVIE-LOVERS: "Hillary: The Movie," a 2008 documentary starring (if that's the right word) conservative pundit Ann Coulter, who derides the then-Democratic frontrunner as dishonest and dishonorable. Clinton is certainly fair game, much as President Bush was for filmmaker Michael Moore in "Fahrenheit 911." But because the Clinton film was funded largely by corporate donations, long-standing disclosure laws kicked in when the filmmakers tried to advertise it.

The question now before the U.S. Supreme Court is whether the government can limit corporate money in political campaigns. Sadly, the court seems poised to side with the filmmakers, assuring we'll see future hit pieces from anonymous organizations, on both sides, hitting theaters two weeks before national elections. At least, in Moore's case, you knew who was paying for the propaganda.

MOST DENTALLY CHALLENGED INVESTMENT OPPORTUNITY: Candy sales are through the roof all over the country. Cadbury reported a 30 percent rise in profits for 2008, Nestle's profits grew by 10.9 percent, and Hershey, which struggled for most of 2008, was up by 8.5 percent in the fourth quarter. Some specialty shops have reported jumps of as much as 300 percent. "All is well in candy land," Jamie Hallman, owner of the Sweetdish store in San Francisco, told the New York Times last week. Finally, good news. Put us down for 100 shares of Swedish Fish.

JUST NEEDS VACUUMING AWARD: Spurge, begone. Dandelions, away. Leaders in the Orange County city of Garden Grove have voted to allow residents to rip out their lawns and install Astroturf-type artificial grass. We like that idea: Saves water, minimizes lawnmower fumes, and creates growth potential for carpeting companies and vacuum-cleaner sales. Can we do that here? Absolutely -- no ordinance bans it.

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